“It’s never happened to me before!”

Johnny Johnstone, an aspiring racer and equally aspiring ladies man talks a big game, both on and off the track. If he’s not whipping his junior level open-wheeler into the top-twenty on weekends, he’s at the local track bar chatting up various unimpressed female suitors.

A fan of inspirational messaging, Johnny posts up a direct quote to his 75 followers on Instagram from Jackie Stewart, connecting his driving prowess to his pick-up game. He states that “cornering perfectly is like bringing a woman to climax” and that race one today will exhibit exactly that for him. This is in spite of him going home alone the night before and having the same connection to his machinery as a bear with a buzzsaw.

Johnny’s first lap from 22nd position on the grid ended in a total rebuttal of his inspirational messaging and life mantra when he met the tyre wall whilst misreading his cars messaging of understeer and cold tyres on the first lap.

A premature end to a self confident weekend, but give it a couple of hours and he’ll be ready to go again.